Dear Husband...

The angel food cake on our counter is not cotton candy. We do not rip off pieces of it to eat and leave the rest! Please cut yourself a piece and leave the rest so that when I go get myself a piece I'm not trying to cut mountains. Thank you.

Slacker!

I have been such a slacker keeping things up to date on here. This is exactly why I was hesitant about starting a blog but I will keep trying!

So, I will do some quick updates. After the first month of OPK's I found out that I was ovulating around CD 15 out of a 24 days cycle. This could be an issue because my luteal phase may not be long enough. I never heard about luteal phases until I did some research and talked to some friends who also dealt with fertility issues. Your luteal phase is the time from when you ovulate to the time you get your period. If its too short then the fertilized egg doesn't have enough time to attach therefore you get your period and there is no pregnancy. Ideally the luteal phase should be 12-14 days but mine is more around 9-10. Anything below 9 is considered too short and this can be caused by low progesterone.

My last period was very strange at first (TMI WARNING!) because I had some tissue discharge, almost like it was my period without the blood. I have never had that before but no positive HCG tests. Now that I have had some answers regarding my ovulation it makes total sense why I am not getting pregnant. I was totally missing ovulation!

I started OPK's this month as well and the same thing happened, positive OPK on CD15. I also started charting my temperature this month. Up until 2 days ago I was using a regular thermometer because I didn't have a BBT one. Now that I have one I think my first temp's were quite off so I likely wont have any clear data until next month. That is if they will even be right because from time to time I'm still up several times at night with A fussing.

I was trying to avoid calling my OB because last time I felt very brushed off but I did it anyway. I asked if I could request a progesterone test to see if maybe my levels were low. If they were, that would explain the m/c, short periods and short luteal phase. I'm waiting for a call back to see what the OB says (HA! as I was typing this sentence my OB called back and said she will give me the script and I will have to get it done between CD21 and CD23 which will be next Monday!)

That's pretty much all my updates for now. I did a really cool project last week that a lot of friends have been asking me to do a tutorial for. Now that my Etsy shop has slowed down a bit I will try to take the time to write it out. Hope everyone had a good  4th of July!!!

Ovulation For the Win!

After waiting for what seemed like forever I believe I have finally ovulated. Now it makes sense why we haven't gotten pregnant in the past 2 months, we have been totally missing ovulation. I have been using Fertility Friend and My Day's to track my periods and they spit out estimated dates of ovulation for you which have been completely wrong. I probably shouldn't have relied so much on them since I'm not temping but its good to see and know when I actually ovulate and that I actually am ovulating.

I don't really have anything more exciting to say today. I'm excited that its Friday and the weekend will be fairly cool. I'm planning on doing some garage sale shopping and hopefully score some deals! Happy weekend everyone!

Still Waiting....

I have been doing great with taking the OPK's and I'm still waiting for a positive. In the mean time S and I have been enjoying some daily "quality time together" just to make sure we don't miss it ;-). Since I still haven't gotten a positive its making me wonder if this will be another long cycle. I think my longest was 35 days (I know not all that long but longer than usual for me) and my shortest was 23.

I have been using both Fertility Friend and My Day's to track my periods every month. I have about 3-4 months noted and what is interesting is that both app's have the same data but both are giving me different ovulation prediction's. Unless I am temping it will never be fully accurate but I am curious to see which app will be closer with its estimation. So far Fertility Friend has lost the game. It predicted I would have ovulated in the past 3 days and nada. My Day's predicts the 12th. Lets see what happens!

Here are my tests so far.

Started OPK's

I mentioned in my previous post that I started OPK's yesterday. I even made a chart to tape them to so I can keep track but also keep them out of S's view. I don't want my pee sticks laying all around the house! I know he understands but I kind of want to keep him out of the loop. I want him to enjoy this process instead of turning it into a science project. I also think men don't get as stressed and obsessive about this stuff as women do.

 Even though I am still ok with not getting pregnant again I am interested to see how my body works. I am also curious to see how well this aligns with the ovulation prediction calendars I have been doing such  as Fertility Friend. Here are my strips so far.

Feeling Better

I've been trying to take things a big slower and take some time to myself during nap time's and I have been feeling better. Sometimes I just need to stop, relax, and realize that everything cant be done all at once. A and I have been having a great week and we took Monday and Tuesday off from playdates to just be together and relax. The weather was great so we enjoyed some Dunkin Donuts and park time and we even did some Father's Day shopping.

So, I think I'm pretty awesome! I decided to get a bidet for our bathroom and guess what? I installed it all by myself! It looked pretty intimidating but while A was napping I took it all apart and installed it. The directions were pretty easy therefore it made the installation a breeze. I didn't tell S about it until he got home so it was an interesting surprise ha ha

After it was installed it I decided to give it a go. Apparently its a good idea to start of slow and low otherwise you get quite the shock. Not only is it super strong but its also very, very cold. It is rather refreshing though I must say!

In other news, I finally got my OPK. I started using them today since I am on CD 8 and I am curious to see what day ovulation lands on. I have had estimates here and there since my cycle lengths have been so crazy so it will be interesting to see where it falls. I am quite excited. Some of my friends recommended testing 2x a day so that you don't miss the surge. Maybe once it gets closer I will test 2x but for now I will stick to once a day. I'll keep everyone updated!

Feeling Very Overwhelmed

For the past few days I have been feeling very overwhelmed. Some days are ok and some day are so so and other's are kind of bad. Today is one of those bad days. It feels like I cant keep up with life. Everything is happening so fast and I don't have the energy to keep up. I get easily frustrated, feel like I need a break and sometimes just feeling down because of it all.

I don't think its depression, I still enjoy everything I do throughout the day but I would say its more so anxiety. I hate that I cant get everything done and enjoy myself. I feel constant pressure to get things done and have everything perfectly done but its just not realistic. Not getting things done makes me feel lazy like I'm slacking but at the end of the day I just want to sit and read a book. What stinks is that when I do relax I keep circling in my head how I need to be doing something productive. Its like a never ending cycle. Sometimes I feel like I just need to get away from everything and everyone.

I am never alone. Ever. S used to travel a lot which I didn't like because I was alone. Since A came and S stopped traveling I haven't been alone. S doesn't get in my way or anything but he feel's like a pressure. Pressure to be doing something. Its hard to explain my feelings but they are very frustrating. We have been doing everything ourselves with no help from anyone and its been hard. I wont lie, there are easy days but then there are days like today when I just want the world to stop, just for one minute...or maybe an hour....or a day...